40 Ways to Practice Pleasure

I’m turning 40!
Here are 40 ways I’ve learned about and experienced pleasure!

Every Day Happenings

  • “Gigil” - Tagalog, wanting to squish something super cute

  • The moment you lay down in your own bed after a long day

  • Taking off your shoes/bra/pants after being in them all day

  • Laughing deep belly laughs

  • The first bite of a snack/dish that you’ve been craving

Nature is Calling

  • Sitting in a sunny window or sitting outside

  • Noticing the way the clouds are moving or how the wind is blowing

  • Being near or in a body of water

  • Interacting with an animal or your pet

  • Warm summer nights of silent snowy nights

Social Connections

  • Chatting with a friend who completely gets you

  • Meaningful, 20 second long, consensual hugs

  • Participating in a cause you believe in

  • Attending a concert or performance

  • Social media interactions that leave you feeling happy

Hard Feelings

  • Doing something even when you’re nervous about its

  • Crying to release emotions and pressure

  • The moment you realize you’re crushing on someone

  • Saying Goodbye

  • “Saudade” - Brazilian or Portuguese word for nostalgia or longing

Sharing Your Skills

  • Completing a project

  • Being recognized for something you are proud of

  • The moment you realize you have a great idea

  • Sharing information you know

  • Learning something new that can benefit your work

Sexual Healing

  • A first kiss

  • Eye contact that’s conveying something only you know

  • Anticipation of a pleasing act

  • Being asked how you want to be touched

  • Feeling satisfaction after sexual play, solo or partnered

No is a Complete Sentence

  • Deciding to say no to a social engagement

  • When they respond with, “Thank you for taking care of yourself!”

  • Not answering work-related messages during off hours

  • Setting boundaries with family members

  • Delete. Block.

Blurry But Beneficial

  • Sticking to a schedule you created for yourself

  • Treating yourself after paying a bill

  • Clearing out and cleaning a small area

  • Making appointments for your physical and mental health

  • Making a difficult decision

The problem with these listicles is that they can appear like a check list or like some form of measurement to judge oursevles. These are meant to be examples of a variety of experiences and practices. Certainly, many are missing and even more that we have yet to experience.

For me, pleasure has been my way of staying grounded, feeling embodied, and wading through the various traumas I've experienced these 40 years.

Pleasure has been my guide and my homing beacon.

Everyone's relationship to pleasure varies.

Which ones resonated with you? Which ones will you view differently with a pleasureable lens?

Would you like to have some dedicated time in your week crafting your pleasure practice?